Those crazy canucks

Ever gone ice fishing? I know I sure have! I've never quite done it like these people though, but I guess it would work. Anyways just make sure you measure the ice before you go out, and don't forget your bathing suit. eh?

Mark, this new mustache... it's... changed you...

Here's a picture I found funny. I think it would be hard to ride a bicycle like that though. What if you hit a bump and flew off the front? I have enough trouble riding my own modern bike as it is. I broke my last bike when I was riding home from school. Hit a pothole and just fell over. Scraped up my leg pretty bad and bent the wheel and wrecked the brakes. Sounds pretty funny doesn't it? It was less funny for me. Anyways what I'm trying to say is that if I had a bike with a huge wheel like that in the front I don't think my riding would get better.

Brilliant

This is a genius idea. You can feel like you're the most important person, even if you're just picking up trash on the side of the highway. You can pretend you're Brad Pitt or Orlando Bloom when you're walking to school. Kanye West or Channing Tatum when you're walking to the grocery store. Everywhere you go, you will know that you are red carpet worthy. And the best part is you don't have to share with anyone.

Blackbird

I really like this song. It's by the Beatles and it's very peaceful and the guitar is really nice in it. I don't play the guitar very much, but I know a few songs on it. "Baby" by Justin Bieber is sadly the first song I ever learned on guitar. "Why are you sad about that?" you ask, well I'm not a Justin Bieber fan. Not at all. I prefer the Red Hot Chili Peppers, the Beatles, Chiddy Bang, Fun. and other bands. It's not that Justin Bieber is bad, he's just not my type. "Why did you learn his song on guitar if you don't like him?" Another great question. My neighbor who plays guitar very well and likes Justin Bieber decided that I should learn guitar, and also like Justin Bieber. I did learn guitar, but I still don't like Justin Bieber. Anyways enjoy this song!

Dum Dum, give me more Gum Gum

Are you always broke? Are you struggling to fund your pop rocks addiction? Are you bored with your plain old job that offers no excitement? Well do I have a job for you!

GUM BUSTER

Now I know you're asking yourself, "Is this like a ghost buster?" Not quite. These wonderful heroes are in charge of scraping gum off of everything. Without them our world would be a giant piece of bubble gum. "That would be cool." Nope. It wouldn't be a nice pink soft piece of gum like you're thinking. It would be a hard, stale, gray piece of pre-chewed awfulness. I know now you feel bad for sticking your gum under that park bench or just leaving it on the sidewalk after it fell out of your mouth when you were laughing, but don't. If you didn't, there would be no job for these wonderful people.

Let me take you through a day in their lives. You can make about 400$ for just a few hours of work. Gum busters are very popular in bigger cities where there are more people, and more gum. They use special machines that remove gum in a matter of minutes.

A Gum buster

There are gum busters all over the world. They work hard to keep our sidewalks clean.

Whenever there's a piece of gum on the sidewalk... they'll be there. When you feel a mountain of gum underneath that bench.... They will be there. When you're walking down the sidewalk and you step on a fresh piece of pink chewing gum... They. Will. Be. There. So next time you're walking home and you narrowly avoid a piece of gum, say thanks to the gum busters who will clean it up for you.

All you need is love..

There's nothing you can do that can't be done. Nothing you can sing that can't be sung. Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game It's easy. There's nothing you can make that can't be made. No one you can save that can't be saved. Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be you in time - It's easy.

Today we are posting about someone we admire and I chose the Beatles. I chose the Beatles because they were very opposed to violence and really believed in living peacefully with one another. They really believed that you should be happy. They came from  humble beginnings and created an era. They combined meaningful lyrics with catchy melodies and really got their message of loving everyone across.

The members of the Beatles are John Lennon, Paul McCartney, George Harrison and Ringo Starr. Pete Best and Stuart Sutcliffe were also a part of the band at one time. There music was very inspirational and they developed a whole generation of followers. Not everyone believed in their music, but that didn't stop them. They could have changed their music to fit in, but they didn't. They stood by what their style was and paved the way for many artists to come.
 

                                    
The main reason I chose the Beatles was the message in their songs. They sing of love and peace and I really admire that. There were people who threatened them and they didn't let that stop them. They sang from the heart and believed in what they sang.

 "There's nothing you can do that can't be done" If you believe in yourself anything is possible. "And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make." Love one another. "I get by with a little help from my friends." Friends are a very important part of life. "The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful, and so are you." You are important and don't let anyone else tell you different. "Hello, hello, hello. I don't know why you say good-bye, I say hello." No matter what there will be another chance, so don't be sad, look forward to the future.

Snow

Sadly it snowed. Everyone was real excited but I'm not. It's just going to snow more and more, piling up until we can't take it anymore. Anyways this picture pretty much sums it up.

Wake me up before you go-go...

Today we are exploring the world, tomorrow the universe! But like I said, today we are exploring the world.

I wasn't sure what country to visit, so I pulled up a list of all of the countries in the world, closed my eyes and picked one. The country is........
FALKLAND ISLANDS
 
Never heard of them? Before today I hadn't either, but together we will learn.
 The Falkland Islands are located close to Argentina in the South Atlantic Ocean.



The Falkland Islands are a cluster of around 700 islands with two main islands, West Falkland and East Falkland.

DID YOU KNOW?
The islands contain 5 different species of penguins!

How do you get to The Falkland Islands? Well there aren't any direct flights, so you'll need to do some transfers. You'll also need to be flexible with your dates of travel as the flights will take around 2 days just to get to Punta Arenas, Chile, which isn't even your final destinations. If you left October 11th at 3:20 p.m. you would fly non-top coach to Toronto and arrive at 8:26 p.m. Then at 10:35 p.m. you'll fly to Santiago, Chile and arrive there at 10:05 a.m October 12th. Then you'd have a 23 hour layover (to do some exploring!) Then make your way to Punta Arenas, Chile. The flight leaves at 9:50 a.m and you'll arrive at 2:20 p.m. The total cost of these flights including return trips is 1988$ Canadian dollars. After you arrive in Punta Arenas, there is a flight to Mount Pleasant Airport in the Falkland Islands that leaves at 3:15 p.m. on October 27th and arrives in the Falkland Islands at 5:00 p.m. Now that will cost you another 788$, but if you're gonna travel why not go all out, right?

So this will be day 16 of your travels! I hope you enjoyed Chile while you were waiting for your flight to the beautiful country of the Falkland Islands. Now that you're there you will looking for things to do.

FIVE MUST DO THINGS WHILE VISITING THE FALKLAND ISLANDS

-Stargaze. The combination of lack of air and light pollution makes for a clear night sky with a nice view of southern constellations, other planets, and maybe even a shooting star or two.

-Go Fishing. Even if you wouldn't normally this is one of the last places you can go wilderness fishing and regularly catch fish bigger than 5kg.

-Go Shopping. There are many places to buy beautiful hand crafted items. The Falkland Wool is very soft and local. There are many wooden trinkets made from shipwrecks and driftwood. There are artists paintings of the sea scape and beautiful handmade jewelry.

 

 -Museums. The Falkland Islands Museum is definitely worth a visit. It tells the rich history of the islands. It has many artifacts and shows how it was difficult for the first settlers to adapt to this remote paradise.

 -Wildlife. There are five types of penguins including majestic kings, rockhoppers, gentoo, magellanic and even the elusive macaroni penguin. There are more types of interesting birds including cara-cara and black-browed albatross

Here is a video about the Falkland Islands I really enjoyed.





It showed a lot of the beauty of the islands.

I really want to go visit the Falkland Islands now. They are full of beauty and adventure. I know where I'm going next vacation!

What's the one day of the year you can put gravy on your salad?

If you guessed thanksgiving you are correct!!! Your prize is leftover turkey!!!
Ever seen that episode of friends where Joey gets a turkey stuck on his head? It pretty much sums up my thanksgiving. Except for the turkey on the yea part. But we did run out of plates and I had to use a platter. I really love thanksgiving because it brings everyone together. What are you thankful for? And now a quote from Joey tribioni himself:
Joey: You can't have Thanksgiving without turkey. That's like Fourth of July without apple pie, or Friday with no two pizzas.

What to do....

I think everyone has had a time in their life when they are so bored they think they literally might die but they have no money to go to a movie or something. So I, the expert of having no money, am here to tell you some of my ideas of what to do when your cashflow consists of what you've found between the couch cushions and random pennies on the sidewalk.
1. Take a nap
2. Take a shower
3. Brush your teeth
4. Walk around
5. Make a friend on your walk
6. Make up a game with that friend
7. Call your other friends to learn the new game you made up with your new friend and play it
8. Name your game
9. Assemble a flash mob
10. Pretend you're stuck in the wilderness and film it
11. Go to the park
12. Go on the swings at the park
13. Go home and disinfect your scrapes from when you fell of the swings
14. Stand in your backyard
15. Catch a frog
16. Name it Indiana Toad
17. Make a video of Indiana Toad and put it on youtube
18. Release Indiana Toad back into your backyard
19. Mow your lawn
20. Sadly realize that during the process of mowing your lawn you have ran over and killed Indiana Toad
21. Have a funeral for Indiana Toad
22. Post Indiana Toad's funeral on youtube
23. While you're on youtube look up some funny videos
24. After that check out my blog www.myfatgiraffeblog.blogspot.com
25. Then check out my cousin blog www.myfatdogblog.blogspot.com
25. If you're up for a awful good time try Photoshopping Susan Boyle's head onto Taylor Laughtner's body, it's quite fun
26. Then try it with different celebrity combinations such as, but not limited to: Dumbledore and Taylor Laughtner, Susan Boyle and a Calvin Klein model, Harry Potter and Megan Fox, Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber, Justin Bieber and a Fat dog, etc.
27. Hand out copies of your Photoshopped celebrities to people on the street
28. Hand out autographs
29. Scroll back up and realize I put 25 twice
30. Invent the next big thing
31. Realize you don't have any idea what the next big thing is (If you do congratulations! I'll be looking forward to seeing what your creative mind has molded.)
32. Call up your friend from your walk and see if they want their face Photoshopped onto anything
33. Draw a picture
34. Sign that picture and give it to someone on the street
35. Dabble with the thoughts of the creation of mankind
36. Contemplate the meaning of life
37. Write a poem about your intense thoughts
38. Realize all of that thinking made you hungry and prepare a snack
39. Try switching things up for a snack today. Don't rule out unusual food combinations, try something new. Think sweet and salty, hot and cold, meaty and vegetably. My recommendation is a nice ham and cheese sandwich, topped with Doritos. Never rule out taco in a bag. If you're looking for a delicious snack taco in a bag is always a real gem.
40. Learn a new sport
41. Ponder what your success as a professional race walker could be
42. Read my blog post about race walking
43. Wonder if being an Olympic race walker could support a family
44. Practice race walking
45. Realize why race walking isn't one of the televised Olympic sports
46. Phone your walking friend and see if they want to race walk with you
47. Sadly realize that no one wants to race walk with you
48. Pretend the floor is lava and jump around like a ninja
49. Learn to dougie
50. Learn to dance Gangham style
51. Learn the words to Gangham style, even the Korean part
52. Perform your newly acquired Korean signing and dance moves for your walking friend
53. Go for a bike ride
54. Start a biker gang
55. Realize you are a lone wolf and ride off into the distance alone
56. Start a twitter account
57. Tweet your feelings
58. Get a bunch of followers and become a Twitter Sensation
59. Realize you can't deal with your haters and delete your Twitter account
60. Reactivate your account one last time to say farewell to your faithful followers
61. Go meet your neighbors
62. Start a neighborhood-wide game of hide and go seek tag
63. Start a Kpop band in your garage
64. Create a catchy song that has the right amount of "oooooh"'s "aaaaah"'s and creative dance moves
65. Post the mega smash hit on youtube
66. Break up your band because "You didn't realize the amount or mental, physical and emotional trauma this lifestyle would create."
67. Use creative pickup lines on your dog such as "Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again."
68.  Realize that your line wasn't actually "smooth like peanut butter, (or I guess it might've been, if you buy crunchy peanut butter!) " and that you shouldn't be hurt if your dog just looks at you and walks away
69. Give your dog a bath
70. Give your dog a haircut but leave hair on his legs so it looks like he's wearing boots.
71. Take your dog for a walk and realize all of his doggy friends don't like him anymore
72. Console your dog
73. Realize he's still upset about that atrocious pickup line

Olympic Sport?

Ever heard of race walking? Me neither. Don't worry it actually is a sport. It's a 20 km footrace for men and women (or 50 km for men only) and it's a legitimate Olympic sport. "How do they not just run?" you ask? Well the official rules state that you must have one foot on the ground at all times. Race walking made it's first appearance at the Olympics in 1904. According to Wikipedia, race walking is often considered an artificial and slightly controversial sport. Why is it controversial? I'm not 100% sure, but I know what sport I'm training for in 2016! Remember never underestimate a race walker, you never know when someone might come up to you and say walk fast for 20 km or I'll kill you....

Star Wars?

Just about everybody I know has an opinion on Star Wars, good or bad, which movies are better, and stuff like that. Anyways here are a few videos loosely based on Star Wars, I thought both of them were pretty clever. If you don't like them you can get off my blog and never come back!!!!! And if you do like them tell your friends!!! Then I can have the best blog in the world!!!

Fat Countdowns

 Continuing with the theme of fatness, I've started "Fat Countdowns." They're on the right side of my blog --------------> (look that-a-way!) Aaaaand it's just a simple countdown to some important events in my life. My first countdown is for my birthday which is in 17 days. I can't wait til I'm fifteen so I can get my license! Just kidding... that will still take a year. I'll keep thinking of more countdowns to add and annoy you with. Ever wonder how long it is until my bedtime? Well now you can know! So amazing right? Anyways that's the story behind Fat Countdowns, and the advice for today is practice doesn't make perfect if you're practicing wrong. Save time; learn it the right way.

My First Blog Post

Ain't that just the fattest giraffe you've ever saw? Some say that's what would happen if McDonald's hit Africa. I've named my blog after this beautiful picture. If you like fat animals check out my good bud's blog at myfatdogblog.blogspot.com She's a solid friend who's kind of obsessed with animal obesity too. I hope a lot of people read my blog so I can be famous and get a lot of twitter followers and become famous like Perez Hilton and what not. I had a dream blog before, but no one would read it... so I'm trying again. Now I know you're thinking... how great can a blog about an overweight African mammals be? Well the real question is why are you judging my blog? You can't just waltz in here and go "Well your blog isn't to my liking." Maybe you should give it chance. Stop judging people. It's wrong. I don't go to your blog and judge it. So show some respect and accept my blog for what it is. And don't go leaving me comments on how to improve it. It's perfect just the way it is. If you think you can improve it, I think we're a bit confused on our positions here. I make this blog awesome, you read it and tell your friends. So yeah, read the blog and enjoy or get out of here.
And before I go a piece of advice for you to think about, When you're awesome, it's not if you win, it's by how much.